Journal for First Week of Teaching

     One of the first things I'm aware of, even after a little more than a week, is how the nervousness and anxiety has not dissipated nearly enough as I'd like it to (or thought that it would). I came in thinking that the first two days would be the hurdles to get over, and then it would gradually get better, but that hasn't been the case.
     Monday went Okay- not worse, not better. I had a lot planned for the first time and had very clear, elaborate instructions and explanations for their assignments and duties (i.e. the grading contract). After a while of explaining various things, I would keep asking them, "Does this makes sense?" "Do you understand this?" and they were adamant that they did. I should have known that of course they could not have possibly absorbed all of that information, because within the next two days, I had numerous emails saying they didn't know how to post their blogs as well as multiple IWAs that were done incorrectly.
     I went into Wednesday with more purpose than I had on Monday. Because they post to the blackboard blog, I was able to read a couple of their reading responses prior to class, and thus, was able to discern which areas or ideas needed more explanation and clarity, and which they understood. I found the IWAs most helpful when the students were honest with me-e.g. "I did not understand framing at all!" or "I'm not sure what the metaphor was." Wednesday was also a little disheartening because, while I thought many students HAD understood the Greene reading quite well, during discussion, it wasn't clear that anyone had even read it. I know they did read it because of their responses, but there is definitely a disconnect between what they say in their blogs and their hesitancy to speak up when I ask similar questions. I can only assume that it is partially the questions I ask, and I'm constantly trying to ask questions that are clear, straight-forward, relevant, and mildly interesting. One good thing that happened on Wednesday was that I think I helped clarify what Project 1 would involve, as they were not familiar with what constructs were (something I hadn't anticipated at all). I think one of the hardest things about teaching is anticipating what are brand new concepts to them, and what they can handle because they're already familiar.
    Friday went better. We had more time for discussion about Kleine, which I wanted because I knew they would probably struggle with this reading (vocab). I was once again disappointed with the discussion. I don't know if that's just how Fridays will go, but they were not even trying towards the last 10 or so minutes. This next week I am going to try to work on having more authority during discussion i.e. make them know that they have to answer the questions that I ask. I didn't think it would bother me, but the silence is definitely uncomfortable, and it's easier for me to rephrase the question or move on than wait, and I have to stop that. One thing I noticed was that nobody raises his or her hand when answering questions. I'm not sure if that is a sign of disrespect/disregard for authority, but I will try to change that this week as well. I'm also going to include more group work to break them up; they're a talkative bunch when they want to be, so maybe straight discussion just isn't the best method for them.